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A Little Humor & A Lot Of Hope

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A Little Humor & A Lot Of Hope
by Erin Kershaw - Friday, 5 May 2017, 6:53 PM

Hi All!

I wanted to share an amazing experience that happened to me this week. I had one of the best, most enlightening moments that I have had in a year! I was driving in the car, and suddenly, my chin started hurting. Yes, you read that correctly. MY CHIN! Immediately I burst into an almost angry laughter and yelled out loud, "Yeah? Is that the best you can do?!" There were also some other four letter words that I will not mention here. :) HOW RIDICULOUS! My chin!? Come on now!


Then, I turned on Pet Benatar's song "Hit Me With Your Best Shot," and yelled it. It was a really beautiful experience. I cried and laughed, and it gave me so much hope. 


Today is a fear-day today, as it is not just my chin that hurts. However, I keep remembering that "the opposite of fear is love." The book, "A Course In Miracles" is also helping me through this journey. I would recommend it, but only if it speaks to you. 


Someone very wise told me that the goal is not to get rid of the pain, but to get rid of the fear. According to "A Course In Miracles," you fear and love cannot co-exist. So, we must get rid of the fear for the pain to eventually fall away, as it is just a symptom. And the way to do that is through love.  I am not sure what this means to me quite yet, and this pain plays so many tricks in my head, but I am certain that this is the answer.

I was asked out on a date tonight, and I have not been out in a very long time because I see myself as ill. I am not feeling well today, but I am going to go on my first date in quite a while, even though I want to hide under the covers, stay stuck in fear, and do research on my bodily pain. Because I want to start to live my life now. Because this needs to be over. Because this serves no purpose in my life anymore. Because I have been down for too long, and we all have vibrant, full, free lives to live. Thank you all for being so courageous, your posts help me to continue on this path, even on the dark days. “There is nothing to hold onto.”

Picture of Dianna Cunningham
Re: A Little Humor & A Lot Of Hope
by Dianna Cunningham - Friday, 5 May 2017, 10:42 PM

Erin you're in a great place if you can laugh at the pain. I applaud your courage to laugh and not feel sorry for yourself. It's a great way to master the pain and yourself. Keep going and keep living because you'll make it! I love your choice in music as well. You can't get better than Pat Benatar!

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Re: A Little Humor & A Lot Of Hope
by Howard Schubiner - Saturday, 13 May 2017, 10:53 PM

Thanks for sharing, Erin.

You are an amazing person and you will find your way.

When you truly know that you are not damaged, you can decrease fear. When you truly love yourself, you can decrease fear. When you feel strong and powerful, you can decrease fear. When you can watch your mind make these changes in your body, you can detach from the symptoms and allow them to fall away, as they will over time.

It does take time. And it's often an up and down process.

But as you decrease fear, you will be free.

Best, Howard

Picture of Supriya Jadhav
Re: A Little Humor & A Lot Of Hope
by Supriya Jadhav - Tuesday, 23 May 2017, 12:50 PM

In my case the fear is not about damaging myself since its headache also I am alive for last 4 yrs with pain.. The fear is more about will it ever go away. Or do I have to struggle everyday like this.. Trying the Acceptance and commitment therapy but back of the mind I just want to stop the pain..

Picture of Dianna Cunningham
Re: A Little Humor & A Lot Of Hope
by Dianna Cunningham - Tuesday, 23 May 2017, 10:49 PM

We all just want to stop the pain and the acceptance part of the program has been the most difficult for me cause I'm not a patient person but with tms you gotta be patient and you have to sometimes just surrender! Very difficult to do but even I can do it some of the time. If the pain is moving around that's a good sign because it means your brain is fighting for control. Just remember all this takes time and patience and you are never alone. We all care deeply on this site!

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Re: A Little Humor & A Lot Of Hope
by Ann FitzGerald - Wednesday, 24 May 2017, 1:52 AM

Hi All, I am with Supriya in that I have no fear that my pain is anything other than a psychological phenomenon.  I have known this for 18 years.  During this 18 years I have tried many physical therapies (and even a Shamanic healer!) in the hopes that there was something that would fix it.  I have also had psychological counseling.  Some of these therapies have seemed to start to work but then the pain returns.  This is how I am once again assured that it is not a physical problem.  Still, no matter what sort of attitude I try to adopt toward the pain, it does not budge.  I have even started working out, playing my flute, hiking, etc.---all things I had been avoiding for fear it would make the pain worse.  I keep hoping that if I continue with these things, which do still aggravate the pain, eventually my brain will get the message that I know what is going on.  But no luck.  It has been 1.5 years since I discovered "Unlearn Your Pain" specifically and I have gone through the book, emailed back and forth with Steve Ozanich and Dr. Schubiner, etc., but the pain remains.  I feel like I must be the only one in the world with this situation.  Fortunately, the pain is not severe, just NAGGING.

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Re: A Little Humor & A Lot Of Hope
by Cheryl H - Wednesday, 24 May 2017, 2:48 AM
Dear Ann! I have been through the same as you only so, so much longer and I do have severe pain... constantly. I will work with my therapist as long as I can, it is not easy accepting this pain is my life. I just wanted to reach out to let you know that you are not alone!  Hopefully I can eventually send you a more positive post. 

With much compassion, Cheryl